what happens when we find we are fallible

So many times in our lives we feel as if we aren’t good enough, and that is fine. I believe it pushes us to try harder, to dig deeper, to fight longer and set bigger goals. Unfortunately what we get hung on is, the fact they we didn’t reach those goals. Setting the goal is easy, like getting all A’s on our next report card, but then where is the plan to earn those A’s? The world could care less about your plans, God and Buddha, didn’t ask before they set your world in motion, they put you here to realize a few things. At this moment, right now you are where you are supposed to be, the task you completed today and the tasks you didn’t complete today were exactly done the way they were supposed to. The only way it could have been better was if someone else did them perfectly to your specifications, or that you built a solid enough plan, and followed to get everything done that this day had deemed important.

SeatedBuddhaGandhara2ndCentury

SeatedBuddhaGandhara2ndCentury (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I watched Legend find she wasn’t perfect for the first time ever in her life last week. I’m sure it was the first time because I recognized the lost look in her eyes, the fact that at that moment she seemed shorter than her normal “can’t meet the clown’s arm” height, and the sound of despair coming haltingly from her lips. I love her, how do you help someone when they found out they are normal? that as smart as we strive to be, the books we read, the moral compass we adjust to our perfection throughout our lives, sometimes regardless of these efforts we are still imperfect humans despite our best efforts.

Years of experience in any job, where you have the chance to become the old man, makes you appear to others as if you’ve got it all together. The truth is you have simply survived long enough to keep a mental catalog of all of your life and job “not-to-do” list. So I may look like I’m a mind reader, the truth is, 20 years ago I tried the same dumb crap, with the same foreseeable results and am simply still around to save others from themselves. This fact of my life gives me a pleasurable pause and hope. The hope is that in 20 more years of marriage, maybe I’ll have the right answers, other than “yes dear” the hope that maybe I won’t break my children and I will be a good dad, the hope that as this chapter of my life grows closer to ending, graduation is looming closer in the future, maybe there is hope for all of us.

Today I went for a bike ride, just a touch over 20 miles, the weather was awesome, 70 degrees, a little breeze little traffic (rural Tennessee isn’t to bicycle friendly) and I just rode. As I rode past some stables today I saw very few people out and about; One in particular caught my eye. A woman about my age, close to my height and weight jogging, there was no joy, just determination, as I rode up to her, I told her ” You are AWESOME!! Keep it up!” that true joy that came across her face was worth the pain I feel sitting here.

I have an idea, it has nothing to do with the shut down, the war, crappy school lunch programs, or gas prices, but something I now will work. Lets put in our time, work hard, lift others up like Haley Joel did in Pay it forward, and see if we can’t make our world a better place from the inside out, just like I know I am trying every day and I hope you are too.

God the Father 04

Advertisements

2 comments on “what happens when we find we are fallible

  1. Joy Lenz says:

    Very eloquent and very wise, my friend. Thank you.

  2. Loved this post. Mr. T is having a lot of fun working on our random act of kindness list. I am getting tons of pleasure out of seeing him react to others who benefit from his kindness and watching him learn that he, too, can change the world, even as a teenager! Fortunately, he learned long ago that he wasn’t perfect, and he made peace with that is happy being himself!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s